I'll explain, my brothers birthday was on Thursday, but celebrated til yesterday. We went to san dimas park, like when we were children. Visit the mini zoo and viewed the horses. ahhh lovely, I lack nature in my life. We had a picnic, ate fruit chips, and in n out burgers (yum!!!).
Then we headed to Sofia's house to cut Juniors cake. When we got there Victor had a CPR training for all of us. So I know how to perform CPR, yay! We watched some of those fucken naco videos with jokes, stupid jokes that is, but family time was nice.
I got home and began to watch The Holiday. I don't know why I get sad with love movies.
My mind goes back back back... going back is not that good. Although I lived very very happy moments in my life, all is gone. Going back just invades my self with sadness... and I can't help it feel hopeless. Hope is my motivation and when I lose it I break inside.
Many times I wish I could change my stubborn way of being. I always want to know everything behind the scenes. I look back at all the times I pushed him away... and I think of different things I could have done better... but now it is too late. I'm not sure how I feel about second chances. I feel they are never as good as the first one. I've always said, what is meant to be it will be... we just gotta stay strong, head held up high... and don't let your surroundings break us down. We each live the life we want to live.
Thank God for Ari, she is my shoulder and the one person who understands me. We help each other fight our own demons *sigh*... but today I feel better. Just another week at begin at work.
The goo goo dolls place me in a different world... a happy world
Dentro mi botella de cerveza...
...
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